It was decided at work that it was time for baking to move to a competitive level. I have, for some time, been producing cakes for my colleagues; birthdays, leaving parties, Fridays etc all have reaped the benefits of my love of baking. This has mushroomed into the monster that is…
The Cheesecake Off
(like ‘bake off’ geddit?)
Shayan: For months now a young pretender to the throne in the shape of our new membership officer has been boasting about his own baking skills, with particular reference to his famous cheesecake. However, on further probing he admitted that his brother says ‘it just tastes like philadelphia’…
Clair: Clair, our Marketing Officer, made cheesecake for her Dinner for Good party, which, I understand, was a roaring success. Insider knowledge says she is going for an unconventional variation…
Debbie: Who has sulkily agreed to take part, having not originally been included in the discussion for some unknown reason. We hear that she will be going for the ‘no bake’ option.
Me: I’ve never cooked a cheesecake, mainly because I don’t like them, when I was little I used to have to leave the table whilst my family ate cheescake as it made me feel nauseous, but I’m prepared to give it a go with an adult palette after years of avoidance. We can only hope my lack of experience at this particular dish won’t hamper my chances. I’m going for a Nigella recipe (of course).
Each day saw a contender throw their creation to the lions, the whole office were invited to taste and mark in an anonymous online survey courtesy of Zoomerang.
This really has made for an entertaining week, it took our colleagues a little while to get truly into the spirit of the marking but we were soon receiving mocking comments as part of the feedback system, people got a lot more picky because of the competitive nature of the baking and this piled on the pressure, I had the fear by the time I went to bed having made my cheesecake and I got genuinely fucked off when people gave me ‘negative’ (read constructive) criticism.
Everyone has really gotten excited by this and there are talks of future bake-offs (sponge, muffin, chocolate cake) in which the whole office will partake, I don’t think I can bear the anxiety!
Anyway time for the bit you’ve all been waiting for…
The winner: DEBBIE! An impressive 9 out of 10
Shayan, received for his lovely lemon no-bake cheesecake 7.5 out of 10
Clair, received for a choc brownie based vanilla and raspberry cheesecake 8 out of 10
I received, for my Lime and Chocolate cheesecake 8.2 out of 10
Debbie, received for her self created recipe Ginger and Mandarin cheesecake 9 out of 10
This was what I was greeted with on Monday morning by a colleague: ‘I hear you go your ass handed to you on a plate in the cheesecake off’ WTF?!?!
Some of the best comments:
“a bit runny in the middle’ Fuck off! (that was about mine – who do they think they are? It was free cheesecake for crying out loud!)
‘If everyone could eat a piece of this cheesecake the world would be a better place’
‘Wonderful, but, like an elephant I couldn’t eat a whole one’